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Are You a Continual Drip?
by Erika of This Christian Wahm
This Christian Wahm
Helen is on the phone to her best friend, “I wonder why Henry is out in the shed all the time. He should be in here fixing the sink and taking care of that squeaky door I keep telling him about, day after day." Her friend replies, "Maybe you should just kick open the back door and start yelling until he gets the point."
Now, what do you think is wrong with this picture? Do you wonder for one second why poor old Henry is always out in the shed? He probably has a recliner, television and a fridge out there so he can rest his ears from his wife's constant nagging!
Proverbs 27:15 states: "A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike."
Most women know what it's like to have to keep "reminding" their husbands about certain things. Maybe you've asked your husband to stop leaving his dirty clothes next to the hamper on the floor; and to put the clothes inside the hamper. Possibly he has started to remodel the living room months ago and has no ambition to finish the job.
We all have pet peeves when it comes to our spouse; and that's natural. But, if these things are not addressed properly, it could cause a crack in the foundation of your relationship.
Think about the ways you have handled certain frustrating issues with your husband. Why does it make you so angry that he doesn't put the dirty clothes in the hamper, but throws them without care on the floor next to the hamper?
It's all a matter of respect for one another. You feel that your husband should respect you enough to at least hit the clothes hamper or take his muddy shoes off before tracking through the house.
He may feel you should respect the fact that he works hard all day and doesn't need to come home to a nagging wife. You bark at him, and he blocks you out. That goes together as well as oil mixes with water!
No matter what the issue is between you; if you are coming to a stalemate, you need to try a different approach in finding a solution that can make both of you happy.
Nagging has got to be one of the top ten, most irritating things to men. And a sore subject for women is when a man doesn't listen. So, how do you avoid this situation?
Whatever the problem may be; if it's important enough to cause you to be upset, politely ask your husband to have a talk. Treat him with respect and explain to him why you are feeling the way you are feeling. Point blank tell him that this or that is upsetting you and then tell him why. Is this thing he is or is not doing hurting your feelings, making you feel taken for granted? Tell him about it.
Also, make your husband feel as though he can come to you with his pet peeves in return. It's a two way street. I know it's hard to admit, but there are things that we as wives do to irritate our husbands.
Maybe we threw away his favorite tee shirt because it was stained and had a rip. But, we shouldn't have done so without asking first. Maybe we left his tools out in the rain after doing a project; that would be disrespectful and I'm sure he would be annoyed. If he comes to you with these problems and spouts off about it, that makes you feel what? It makes you feel like a scolded child. And when you spout off at him with your frustrations, you make him feel the same.
Offer to try your best to change the behavior that upsets him; and follow through with your offer. And he should do the same for you when the tables are turned.
Marriage is not fifty-fifty. Marriage is both of you giving one-hundred percent all of the time!
Pointing fingers saying, "you always this or that or you'll never change this or that" is not what you'd call proper communication.
Sitting down and gently saying; "could you please try to do or not do this or that" and "this is why I get upset and do you understand why?" Then come to some sort of agreement on how to handle the situation.
The next time you get the overwhelming urge to nag; just think about poor old Henry in the shed; hiding from the constant clucking of his nagging wife. Think about the baffled and frustrated Helen that doesn't understand why he doesn't listen. I don't know about you, but if I had to hear a continual dripping in my ear; I'd be hiding in the shed too!
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Erika runs a website for work at home moms;
This Christian Wahm.com
Do you work at home? Are you searching for a way to work from home?
Stressed? This Christian Wahm can help! Find valuable advice, articles, Christian fellowship and more. Visit her site at:
http://www.thischristianwahm.com
This article provided by the Family Content Archives at: http://www.Family-Content.com
(NOTE: Referral to Web sites not produced
by the Caton Family is for informational purposes only, and does not
necessarily constitute an endorsement of the sites' content.)
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